{"id":6909,"date":"2025-06-10T05:00:20","date_gmt":"2025-06-10T04:00:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=6909"},"modified":"2025-06-10T05:00:20","modified_gmt":"2025-06-10T04:00:20","slug":"swedish-guy-walks-into-a-dingy-little-storefront-travel-agency","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=6909","title":{"rendered":"Swedish guy walks into a dingy little storefront travel agency"},"content":{"rendered":"

One day this Swedish guy walks into a dingy little storefront travel agency, holds up a page out of a newspaper, and says:<\/h2>\n

\u201cYou say in this ad that you have a voonderful luxury cruise for only $69.95. I vant to go on this voonderful luxury cruise.\u201d<\/p>\n

The guy behind the counter says: \u201cSure. Do you have the $69.95 in cash?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI sure do,\u201d says the Swede, plunking the money on the counter.<\/p>\n

At that point, two big thugs leap out of a closet, whack the Swede on the head, drag his unconscious body out the back door, stuff him in a barrel, and drop the barrel into a river that flows past.<\/p>\n

A few moments later, a Norwegian guy walks into the same dingy storefront travel agency, holds up the newspaper and says: \u201cI vant to go on this $69.95 voonderful luxury cruise.\u201d<\/p>\n

The guy behind the counter says: \u201cSure, you got the fare in cash?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou betcha,\u201d says the Norwegian slapping the money on the counter.<\/p>\n

Again, the two big thugs leap out, pound him on the head, drag his limp form out the back door, shove him into a barrel and drop it in the river.<\/p>\n

After a while, the Swede and the Norwegian regain consciousness, and they find that their barrels are bobbing along together.<\/p>\n

The Norwegian says: \u201cGood afternoon. Tell me, do you happen know if they serve dinner on this cruise?\u201d<\/p>\n

The Swede shakes his head and.\u00a0\u201cNo, I don\u2019t think so. They didn\u2019t last year.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A magician had landed a comfortable job on a cruise ship.<\/h2>\n

His act was rendered hilarious by his parrot who would ridicule the magician after every trick, saying \u201cBig deal, the cards up his sleeve.\u201d or \u201cHe put the ball in a hidden floor, the big faker!\u201d<\/p>\n

One night the ship began to sink and while confusion reigned, the magician was just barely able to get to a tiny life boat with his beloved parrot. For two days the magician and parrot floated on the rough seas. Strangely, the parrot sat on the opposite end of the craft just staring at the magician.<\/p>\n

Finally, on the fourth day, the parrot screamed\u00a0\u201cOkay, I give up\u2026 where the hell did you put the god damned boat!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

One day this Swedish guy walks into a dingy little storefront travel agency, holds up a page out of a newspaper, and says: \u201cYou say in this ad that you have a voonderful luxury cruise for only $69.95. I vant to go on this voonderful luxury cruise.\u201d The guy behind the counter says: \u201cSure. Do […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2719,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6909","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6909","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6909"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6909\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6910,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6909\/revisions\/6910"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2719"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6909"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6909"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6909"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}