Three old ladies were sitting at the dinner table discussing their problems with getting old<\/p>\n
The first one said,\u00a0\u201cSometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand while standing in front of the refrigerator, and I can\u2019t remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich\u201d.<\/strong><\/p>\n The second lady says,\u00a0\u201cYes, sometimes I find myself on the landing of the stairs and can\u2019t remember whether I was on my way up or on my way down\u201d.<\/strong><\/p>\n The third one says,\u00a0\u201cWell, ladies, I\u2019m glad I don\u2019t have any of those problems, knock on wood\u201d.<\/strong><\/p>\n As she hit her knuckles on the table she looked up and said,<\/p>\n \u201cThat must be the door\u2026 I\u2019ll get it!<\/strong><\/p>\n A blonde buys two horses and can\u2019t tell them apart. He says to cut one of their tails off.<\/p>\n So she does.<\/p>\n But then the other horse\u2019s tail gets caught in a bush and rips off.<\/p>\n So she can\u2019t tell them apart again.<\/p>\n She asks the farmer for advice a second time.<\/p>\n He tells her to cut one of the horse\u2019s ears.<\/p>\n So she does.<\/p>\n But then the other horse gets its ear ripped in a barbed wire fence.<\/p>\n She is still confused.<\/p>\n She asks the farmer what to do.<\/p>\n He tells her to measure them.<\/p>\n She comes back and says, \u201cThe white horse is 2 inches taller than the black horse!<\/p>\n A blonde walks past a travel agency and notices a sign in the window, \u201cCruise Special \u2013 $99!\u201d<\/p>\n She walks in, puts her money on the counter, and says, \u201cI\u2019d like the $99 cruise special, please.\u201d<\/p>\n The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner tube, then drags her out the back door and downhill to the river, where he pushes her in and sends her floating.<\/p>\n A second blonde walks by a few minutes later sees the sign, walks in, puts her money on the counter, and asks for the $99 special.<\/p>\n She too is tied to an inner tube and sent floating down the river.<\/p>\n Drifting into the stronger current, she eventually catches up with the first blonde.<\/p>\n They float side by side for a while before the first blonde asks, \u201cDo they serve refreshments on this cruise?\u201d<\/p>\n The second blonde replies, \u201d They didn\u2019t last year.\u201d<\/p>\n LOL!!<\/p>\n Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Three old ladies were sitting at the dinner table discussing their problems with getting old The first one said,\u00a0\u201cSometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand while standing in front of the refrigerator, and I can\u2019t remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich\u201d. The second […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2719,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6874","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6874","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6874"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6874\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6875,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6874\/revisions\/6875"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2719"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6874"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6874"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6874"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}
\nSo she asks the farmer next door what she should do.<\/p>\nA blonde walks by a travel agency.<\/strong><\/h3>\n