{"id":6763,"date":"2025-05-30T10:50:49","date_gmt":"2025-05-30T09:50:49","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=6763"},"modified":"2025-05-30T10:50:49","modified_gmt":"2025-05-30T09:50:49","slug":"a-woman-is-sitting-bed-with-her-lover-4","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=6763","title":{"rendered":"A woman is sitting bed with her lover"},"content":{"rendered":"

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.<\/strong><\/h2>\n

\u2018Hurry,\u2019 she said, \u2018stand in the corner.\u2019<\/p>\n

She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder.<\/p>\n

\u2018Don\u2019t move until I tell you,\u2019 she said. \u2018Pretend you\u2019re a statue.\u2019<\/p>\n

\u2018What\u2019s this?\u2019 the husband inquired as he entered the room.<\/p>\n

\u2018Oh, it\u2019s a statue,\u2019 she replied.<\/p>\n

\u2018The Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us, too.\u2019<\/p>\n

No more was said, not even when they went to bed.<\/p>\n

Around 2 AM the husband got up, went to the kitchen, and returned with a sandwich and a beer.<\/p>\n

\u2018Here, have this\u2019 he gives the sandwich and beer to the statue.<\/p>\n

Then he said to the statue: \u2018I stood like that for two days at the Smiths\u2019 house and nobody offered me anything!!\u2019<\/p>\n

If you enjoyed this story, you should check out this one too, which I came across on another site a while ago.<\/strong><\/p>\n

\n

A man and his wife check into a hotel.<\/strong><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

A man and his wife check into a hotel.<\/strong><\/h2>\n

The husband wants to have a drink at the bar, but his wife is extremely tired so she decides to go on up to their room to rest.<\/p>\n

She lies down on the bed\u2026 just then, and elevated train passes by very close to the window and shakes the room so hard she\u2019s thrown out of the bed.<\/p>\n

Thinking this must be a freak occurrence, she lies down once more.<\/p>\n

Again a train shakes the room so violently, she\u2019s pitched to the floor.<\/p>\n

Exasperated, she calls the front desk and asks for the manager. The manager says he\u2019ll be right up.<\/p>\n

The manager is skeptical but the wife insists the story is true.<\/p>\n

\u201cLook\u2026 lie here on the bed \u2013 you\u2019ll be thrown right to the floor!\u201d<\/p>\n

So he lies down next to his wife.<\/p>\n

Just then the husband walks in.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat,\u201d he says, \u201care you doing here?\u201d<\/p>\n

The manager calmly replies, \u201cWould you believe I\u2019m waiting for a train?\u201d<\/p>\n

LOL!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door. \u2018Hurry,\u2019 she said, \u2018stand in the corner.\u2019 She rubbed baby oil all over him, then dusted him with talcum powder. \u2018Don\u2019t move until I tell you,\u2019 she said. \u2018Pretend you\u2019re a statue.\u2019 \u2018What\u2019s this?\u2019 the husband inquired as […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2719,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6763","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6763","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6763"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6763\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6764,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6763\/revisions\/6764"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2719"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6763"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6763"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6763"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}