{"id":6426,"date":"2025-05-06T10:24:39","date_gmt":"2025-05-06T09:24:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=6426"},"modified":"2025-05-06T10:24:39","modified_gmt":"2025-05-06T09:24:39","slug":"before-paddy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=6426","title":{"rendered":"Before Paddy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Before Paddy goes to war he fits a chastity belt on his wife. He locks it and gives the key to his best friend Fergus.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cIf I\u2019m not back within 4 years, open and enjoy!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>He hops on his horse and hits the road.<\/p>\n<p>Half an hour later he noticed a dust cloud behind him.<\/p>\n<p>He stops and sees that it is Fergus.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat\u2019s wrong?\u201d he asks.<\/p>\n<p>Out of breath, Fergus answers: \u201cIt\u2019s the wrong key!!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Before Paddy goes to war he fits a chastity belt on his wife. He locks it and gives the key to his best friend Fergus. \u201cIf I\u2019m not back within 4 years, open and enjoy!\u201d He hops on his horse and hits the road. Half an hour later he noticed a dust cloud behind him. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6426","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6426","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6426"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6426\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6427,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6426\/revisions\/6427"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6426"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6426"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6426"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}