![\"\"](\"https:\/\/teachmelife.b-cdn.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/w3.jpg\")
<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said:<\/h2>\n
\u201cLet\u2019s talk, I am sure that flights are faster if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.\u201d<\/p>\n
The little girl who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and asked the stranger, \u201cWhat would you like to talk about?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh, I don\u2019t know\u201d, said the stranger.<\/p>\n
\u201cHow about n.u.clear power?\u201d The girl asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cOk,\u201d he said \u201cThat could be an interesting topic!\u201d<\/p>\n
The girl continues: \u201cBut let me ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat grass, the same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out a flat patty, and a horse produces clumps of dried grass. Why do you suppose that is?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThe stranger thinks about it and says: \u201cHmmm, I have no idea.\u201d<\/p>\n
To which the little girl replies: \u201cDo you really feel qualified to discuss nuclear power when you don\u2019t know s.hit?\u201d<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Two guys are sitting at a bar.<\/h2>\n
After a bunch of drinks over several hours, one guy hiccups, drops his head down to his chest, pushes himself away from the bar, and proceeds to hurl all over himself.<\/p>\n
Wiping his mouth off on his shirtsleeve, he says, \u201cMan, I gotta go home. I\u2019m already two hours late, and now I\u2019ve thrown up all over myself. My wife is gonna kill me.\u201d<\/p>\n
The second guy turns to the first and says, \u201cNaw she won\u2019t. Listen, you got twenty bucks?\u201d<\/p>\n
The first says, \u201cYeah, why?\u201d<\/p>\n
The second drunk says, \u201cTake the twenty and put it in your front pocket. When you get home and your wife asks what happened, you tell her some guy threw up on your shirt and he gave you twenty bucks for the dry cleaning. I do it all the time.\u201d<\/p>\n
The first guy says, \u201cGreat idea! Let\u2019s have another round\u201d, and the two continued to drink for the next couple of hours.<\/p>\n
Eventually they head home. Sure enough, the first guy\u2019s wife is waiting up for him. As he walks through the door, she takes a look at him and says, \u201cLook at you! You\u2019re pathetic!! You\u2019re five hours late, drunk as a skunk, and you\u2019ve got dried puke all over the front of you! What have you got to say for yourself ?!?\u201d<\/p>\n
He says, \u201cWait honey, listen for a second. This drunken guy threw up on me and gave me twenty bucks to get my shirt dry cleaned, I swear. Check my front pocket.\u201d<\/p>\n
She reaches in and pulls out the money. She says, \u201cWait there\u2019s 40 bucks in here!\u201d<\/p>\n
He says, \u201cOh yeah, he crapped in my pants too!!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
An airplane pilot was welcoming the passengers on the plane shortly after take-off. \u201cLadies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 321, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and therefore we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and\u2026,\u201d when suddenly he […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6251","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6251","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6251"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6251\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6252,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6251\/revisions\/6252"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6251"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6251"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6251"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}