A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach contemplating how badly she came out in the divorce settlement, when she spies a lamp washing up onshore.<\/p>\n
She rubs the lamp, and out pops a genie.<\/p>\n
The genie notices her anger and lets her vent her troubles to him.<\/p>\n
Then the genie informs that he will give her three wishes.<\/p>\n
But, he cautions her, because he does not believe in divorce, he will give her ex-husband ten times what she wishes for.<\/p>\n
The woman is steaming mad, thinking that this is hardly fair, but she makes her first wish.<\/p>\n
The first wish was for a billion dollars.<\/p>\n
The genie grants her wish and she finds herself sitting on one billion dollars.<\/p>\n
The genie then reminds her that her husband is now the recipient of 10 billion dollars.<\/p>\n
The woman can barely contain her anger when she makes her second wish.<\/p>\n
The second wish was for a beautiful mansion on the shore of her own private beach.<\/p>\n
In an instant it was granted, but the genie then reminds again that her ex-husband now owns ten of what she wished for.<\/p>\n
Upon hearing this, the woman takes her time to contemplate her last wish.<\/p>\n
Just as the genie was about to give up on her, the woman informs the genie that she wants to make the last wish.<\/p>\n
But, before she can do this, the genie again warns her that her ex-husband will get ten times what she wishes for.<\/p>\n
No problem, said the woman as she grinned in ecstasy.<\/p>\n
For my last wish..\u201dI\u2019d like to give birth to twins. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A recently divorced woman is walking along the beach contemplating how badly she came out in the divorce settlement, when she spies a lamp washing up onshore. She rubs the lamp, and out pops a genie. The genie notices her anger and lets her vent her troubles to him. Then the genie informs that he […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6094","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6094","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=6094"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6094\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6095,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/6094\/revisions\/6095"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=6094"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=6094"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=6094"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}