MONDAY<\/p>\n
Cooking for Bob is such a joy! Today, I made angel food cake. The recipe said to “beat 12 eggs separately,” so I borrowed extra bowls from the neighbors and got cracking. Literally.
TUESDAY<\/p>\n
Bob asked for fruit salad for dinner. The recipe said \u201cserve without dressing,\u201d so I didn\u2019t wear any. Imagine my shock when Bob walked in with a friend! I suppose I should start reading the whole recipe first.
WEDNESDAY<\/p>\n
Rice night. The instructions said to \u201cwash thoroughly before steaming.\u201d So I hopped in the bath. The rice tasted the same, but at least I was squeaky clean.
THURSDAY<\/p>\n
Bob wanted salad again, so I tried a new recipe. It said: \u201cPrepare ingredients, then toss on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving.\u201d That\u2019s when Bob caught me rolling around in the garden. I\u2019m still not sure what I did wrong.
FRIDAY<\/p>\n
I found a cookie recipe that said to \u201cput all ingredients in a bowl and beat it.\u201d I did \u2014 but when I came back, everything looked exactly the same. I think the recipe was defective.
SATURDAY<\/p>\n
Bob went grocery shopping and brought home a chicken. He told me to \u201cdress it for Sunday.\u201d Not sure why he looked so shocked when I put a tiny sweater on it. Also, he keeps counting to ten around me now.
SUNDAY<\/p>\n
Bob\u2019s parents came for dinner, and I wanted to serve roast. But all I could find was hamburger. I had a lightbulb moment \u2014 I popped the hamburger in the oven and set it to \u201croast.\u201d It still came out as hamburger. Very disappointing.
GOOD NIGHT, DEAR DIARY<\/p>\n
What a week it\u2019s been! I can\u2019t wait for tomorrow \u2014 I\u2019ve got a new recipe I want to try out on Bob. If only we had a bigger oven, I could finally surprise him with that Chocolate Moose.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
MONDAY Cooking for Bob is such a joy! Today, I made angel food cake. The recipe said to “beat 12 eggs separately,” so I borrowed extra bowls from the neighbors and got cracking. Literally.TUESDAY Bob asked for fruit salad for dinner. The recipe said \u201cserve without dressing,\u201d so I didn\u2019t wear any. Imagine my shock […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5740","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5740","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5740"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5740\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5741,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5740\/revisions\/5741"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5740"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5740"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5740"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}