{"id":5579,"date":"2025-03-21T15:29:26","date_gmt":"2025-03-21T15:29:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=5579"},"modified":"2025-03-21T15:29:26","modified_gmt":"2025-03-21T15:29:26","slug":"they-walk-among-us","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=5579","title":{"rendered":"They Walk Among Us"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>They Walk Among Us!<br class=\"html-br\" \/>I was at the checkout at Walmart, minding my own business, when the cashier rang up my total: $46.64. I handed her a crisp $50 bill. She looked me dead in the eye, gave me back $46.64, and continued scanning items like a professional.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Me: &#8220;Uh\u2026 I think there\u2019s a mistake.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/>Her: huffing dramatically &#8220;Sir, I am educated. I know what I\u2019m doing.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>She pushed the money back at me like I was trying to scam her.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>So, I did what any reasonable person would do\u2014I gave it back.<br class=\"html-br\" \/>She, once again, pushed it right back at me with extra attitude.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>I shrugged, picked up my bags, and walked out with $46.64 in my pocket.\u00a0<span class=\"html-span xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x1hl2dhg x16tdsg8 x1vvkbs x3nfvp2 x1j61x8r x1fcty0u xdj266r xat24cr xgzva0m xhhsvwb xxymvpz xlup9mm x1kky2od\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"xz74otr x168nmei x13lgxp2 x5pf9jr xo71vjh\" src=\"https:\/\/static.xx.fbcdn.net\/images\/emoji.php\/v9\/te5\/1\/16\/1f937_200d_2642.png\" alt=\"\ud83e\udd37\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" \/><\/span><br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>I walked into Starbucks with a &#8220;Buy-One-Get-One-Free&#8221; coupon for a Grande Latte. The barista studied it like it was the Declaration of Independence, then turned to a chalkboard that read &#8220;Buy One, Get One Free.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Her eyes lit up. &#8220;Oh! So that means\u2026 they\u2019re both free!&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>She happily handed me two free lattes.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>I didn&#8217;t argue. I just walked out, sipping my victory.\u00a0<span class=\"html-span xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x1hl2dhg x16tdsg8 x1vvkbs x3nfvp2 x1j61x8r x1fcty0u xdj266r xat24cr xgzva0m xhhsvwb xxymvpz xlup9mm x1kky2od\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"xz74otr x168nmei x13lgxp2 x5pf9jr xo71vjh\" src=\"https:\/\/static.xx.fbcdn.net\/images\/emoji.php\/v9\/t91\/1\/16\/2615.png\" alt=\"\u2615\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" \/><\/span><span class=\"html-span xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x1hl2dhg x16tdsg8 x1vvkbs x3nfvp2 x1j61x8r x1fcty0u xdj266r xat24cr xgzva0m xhhsvwb xxymvpz xlup9mm x1kky2od\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"xz74otr x168nmei x13lgxp2 x5pf9jr xo71vjh\" src=\"https:\/\/static.xx.fbcdn.net\/images\/emoji.php\/v9\/t91\/1\/16\/2615.png\" alt=\"\u2615\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" \/><\/span><br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>One day, I was strolling along the beach with some friends when one of them gasped dramatically, pointed ahead, and yelled:<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>&#8220;Look! A dead bird!&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Another friend immediately looked up at the sky and asked, &#8220;Where?&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>I just\u2026 I had no words.\u00a0<span class=\"html-span xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x1hl2dhg x16tdsg8 x1vvkbs x3nfvp2 x1j61x8r x1fcty0u xdj266r xat24cr xgzva0m xhhsvwb xxymvpz xlup9mm x1kky2od\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"xz74otr x168nmei x13lgxp2 x5pf9jr xo71vjh\" src=\"https:\/\/static.xx.fbcdn.net\/images\/emoji.php\/v9\/ta4\/1\/16\/1fae0.png\" alt=\"\ud83e\udee0\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" \/><\/span><br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>My brother was house hunting and asked the real estate agent which direction was north. He explained that he didn\u2019t want the sun waking him up every morning.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>The agent furrowed her brow. &#8220;Wait\u2026 does the sun rise in the north?&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>My brother, thinking she was joking, laughed.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>She was not joking.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>He gently explained that the sun rises in the east\u2026 and, you know, has been doing that for quite a while now.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>She shook her head and said, &#8220;Oh, I don\u2019t keep up with all that stuff.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>I&#8230; I had to walk away.<br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Back when I worked in a 24\/7 call center, a guy called and asked:<br class=\"html-br\" \/>&#8220;What hours are you open?&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Me: &#8220;Sir, we\u2019re open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Him: &#8220;Okay, but is that Eastern or Pacific time?&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>I stared at my screen for a solid 10 seconds before replying:<br class=\"html-br\" \/>&#8220;Uh\u2026 Pacific.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>He thanked me and hung up, probably feeling proud of himself.<br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>My sister has one of those emergency seatbelt cutters in her car\u2014designed to save her life if she ever gets trapped.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>She keeps it in the trunk.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/><span class=\"html-span xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x1hl2dhg x16tdsg8 x1vvkbs x3nfvp2 x1j61x8r x1fcty0u xdj266r xat24cr xgzva0m xhhsvwb xxymvpz xlup9mm x1kky2od\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"xz74otr x168nmei x13lgxp2 x5pf9jr xo71vjh\" src=\"https:\/\/static.xx.fbcdn.net\/images\/emoji.php\/v9\/tc5\/1\/16\/1f926_200d_2642.png\" alt=\"\ud83e\udd26\u200d\u2642\ufe0f\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" \/><\/span><br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>My friends and I went to buy beer for a party. The store had a 10% discount on cases. Since we were professionals, we grabbed two cases.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>The cashier did some quick mental math.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>&#8220;Oh, two cases? That\u2019s 10% + 10%\u2026 so you get 20% off!&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>We all nodded and quietly accepted our new financial advisor.<br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>At the airport, I couldn\u2019t find my luggage, so I went to the lost baggage counter.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Me: &#8220;My bags never showed up.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>The lady smiled reassuringly. &#8220;Don\u2019t worry, sir! I\u2019m a trained professional. Now\u2026 has your plane landed yet?&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>I blinked.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Me: &#8220;Nope, we\u2019re still circling the airport. The pilot told us we\u2019re third in line to land.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Her: &#8220;Oh! Okay, well, come back after you land.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>\u2026Sure thing, genius.<br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>While working at a pizza place, I watched a man order a small pizza to-go.<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Cook: &#8220;Would you like that cut into four or six slices?&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>The man thought long and hard before replying:<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>&#8220;Better make it four. I don\u2019t think I\u2019m hungry enough to eat six.&#8221;<br class=\"html-br\" \/><br class=\"html-br\" \/>Bless their hearts.\u00a0<span class=\"html-span xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x1hl2dhg x16tdsg8 x1vvkbs x3nfvp2 x1j61x8r x1fcty0u xdj266r xat24cr xgzva0m xhhsvwb xxymvpz xlup9mm x1kky2od\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"xz74otr x168nmei x13lgxp2 x5pf9jr xo71vjh\" src=\"https:\/\/static.xx.fbcdn.net\/images\/emoji.php\/v9\/t52\/1\/16\/1f923.png\" alt=\"\ud83e\udd23\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" \/><\/span><span class=\"html-span xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x1hl2dhg x16tdsg8 x1vvkbs x3nfvp2 x1j61x8r x1fcty0u xdj266r xat24cr xgzva0m xhhsvwb xxymvpz xlup9mm x1kky2od\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"xz74otr x168nmei x13lgxp2 x5pf9jr xo71vjh\" src=\"https:\/\/static.xx.fbcdn.net\/images\/emoji.php\/v9\/td0\/1\/16\/1f602.png\" alt=\"\ud83d\ude02\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" \/><\/span><span class=\"html-span xexx8yu x4uap5 x18d9i69 xkhd6sd x1hl2dhg x16tdsg8 x1vvkbs x3nfvp2 x1j61x8r x1fcty0u xdj266r xat24cr xgzva0m xhhsvwb xxymvpz xlup9mm x1kky2od\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"xz74otr x168nmei x13lgxp2 x5pf9jr xo71vjh\" src=\"https:\/\/static.xx.fbcdn.net\/images\/emoji.php\/v9\/t52\/1\/16\/1f923.png\" alt=\"\ud83e\udd23\" width=\"16\" height=\"16\" \/><\/span><br class=\"html-br\" \/>They Walk Among Us\u2026<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>They Walk Among Us!I was at the checkout at Walmart, minding my own business, when the cashier rang up my total: $46.64. I handed her a crisp $50 bill. She looked me dead in the eye, gave me back $46.64, and continued scanning items like a professional.Me: &#8220;Uh\u2026 I think there\u2019s a mistake.&#8221;Her: huffing dramatically [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5579","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5579","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5579"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5579\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5580,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5579\/revisions\/5580"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5579"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5579"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5579"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}