Out of breath he asked, \u201cPlease, may I hide under your skirt? I\u2019ll explain later.\u201d<\/p>\n
The nun agreed. A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, \u201cSister, have you seen a soldier?\u201d<\/p>\n
The nun replied, \u201cHe went that way.\u201d<\/p>\n
After the 2 MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, \u201cI can\u2019t thank you enough, Sister. You see, I don\u2019t want to go to Iraq\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n
The nun said, \u201cI understand completely.\u201d<\/p>\n
The soldier added, \u201cI hope I\u2019m not rude, but you have a great pair of legs!\u201d<\/p>\n
The nun replied, \u201cIf you had looked a little higher, you would have seen a great pair of balls\u2026 I don\u2019t want to go to Iraq either.\u201d<\/p>\n
A trio of old veterans were bragging and jokes<\/p>\n
about the heroic exploits of their ancestors one afternoon down at the VFW hall.<\/p>\n
\u201cMy great grandfather, at age 13,\u201d one declared proudly, \u201cwas a drummer boy at Shiloh.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cMine,\u201d boasts another, \u201cwent down with Custer at the Battle of Little Big Horn.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m the only soldier in my family,\u201d confessed vet number three, \u201cbut if my great grandfather was living today he\u2019d be the most famous man in the world.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cReally? What\u2019d he do?\u201d his friends wanted to know.<\/p>\n
\u201cNothing much\u2026 But he would be 165 years old.\u201d<\/p>\n
General McKenzie was in charge of the Navy, and he was visiting his colleague General Marshall, who was in charge of the Army.<\/p>\n
McKenzie arrives at the military camp and is greeted by Marshall. They both walk around the place, and McKenzie asks: \u2018So how are your men?\u2019 \u2018Very well-trained, Gen McKenzie!\u2019<\/p>\n
\u2018I hope so. My men over at the Navy are so well-trained that they\u2019re the bravest of men in the whole country.\u2019 \u2018Well, my men are very brave, too.\u2019 \u2018I\u2019d like to see that.\u2019<\/p>\n
So Marshall calls Private Cooper and says: \u2018Private Johnson! I want you to stop that tank coming here with your body!\u2019 \u2018Are you crazy? I\u2019m out of here!\u2019<\/p>\n
As Private Johnson ran away, Marshall turned to a bewildered McKenzie and said: \u2018You see?\u00a0You have to be pretty brave to talk like that to a general.\u2019<\/p>\n
A new general was allotted to a new army base.<\/p>\n
After some time in the base he realized how there were two army men guarding an empty bench in shifts. He asked his colleagues and his juniors what it was all about.<\/p>\n
A colleague said \u201cI don\u2019t know but it\u2019s been a tradition here since joined 35 years ago.\u201d<\/p>\n
The general confused as he was went through the past generals of that base till he found the one that was in charge 35 years ago.<\/p>\n
He attempted to find him, and found that he had retired and he lived in the countryside now. He contacted him and requested to meet.<\/p>\n
On the day of the meeting the general asked the retired commander why that bench was guarded so much. The commander was shocked.<\/p>\n
\u201cSo you\u2019re telling me the paint on that bench hasn\u2019t dried yet?!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Out of breath he asked, \u201cPlease, may I hide under your skirt? I\u2019ll explain later.\u201d The nun agreed. A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked, \u201cSister, have you seen a soldier?\u201d The nun replied, \u201cHe went that way.\u201d After the 2 MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5400","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5400","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5400"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5400\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5402,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5400\/revisions\/5402"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5400"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5400"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5400"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}