{"id":5181,"date":"2025-03-01T07:10:07","date_gmt":"2025-03-01T07:10:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=5181"},"modified":"2025-03-01T07:10:07","modified_gmt":"2025-03-01T07:10:07","slug":"a-man-and-a-woman-who-have-never-met-before","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=5181","title":{"rendered":"A man and a woman who have never met before"},"content":{"rendered":"

A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train.<\/h2>\n

After the initial embarrassment they both go to sleep, the man on the top bunk, the woman on the lower.<\/p>\n

In the middle of the night the man leans over, wakes the woman and says, \u201cI\u2019m sorry to bother you, but I\u2019m awfully cold and I was wondering if you could possibly get me another blanket?\u201d<\/p>\n

The woman leans out and, with a glint in her eye, says, \u201d I have a better idea, just for tonight, let\u2019s make pretend that were married.\u201d<\/p>\n

The man says happily, \u201cOK!\u201d AWESOME!\u201d<\/p>\n

The woman says,\u00a0\u201cGOOD \u2026. get your own darn blanket!!!\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The blonde wife came home from her first day commuting into the city.<\/h2>\n
<\/div>\n

Her husband noticed she was looking a little peaked and asked, \u201cHoney, are you feeling all right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot really,\u201d she replied. \u201cI\u2019m nauseated from sitting backward on the train.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cPoor dear,\u201d he said.\u00a0 \u201cWhy didn\u2019t you ask the person sitting across from you to switch seats for a while?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI couldn\u2019t,\u201d<\/strong>\u00a0she replied,\u00a0\u201cthere was no one there.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Lady: Is this my train?<\/h2>\n
<\/div>\n

Station Master: No, it belongs to the Railway Company.<\/p>\n

Lady: Don\u2019t try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi.<\/p>\n

Station Master: No Madam, I\u2019m afraid it\u2019s too heavy.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby.<\/h2>\n

One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

He held her hand as she went through a trying birth. In the end, there were two little baby boys.<\/p>\n

The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, \u201cAll right, who\u2019s the other father!?\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Two little boys, one blond, one with brown hair, were arguing over whose father could beat the other\u2019 up.<\/h2>\n

The brown-haired kid said, \u201cMy father is way better than yours.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

The blond came back, \u201cMaybe, but my mother is better than yours.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s what my father says.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment they both go to sleep, the man on the top bunk, the woman on the lower. In the middle of the night the man leans over, wakes the woman and says, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5181","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5181"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5182,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5181\/revisions\/5182"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5181"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5181"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5181"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}