{"id":5049,"date":"2025-02-18T12:48:17","date_gmt":"2025-02-18T12:48:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=5049"},"modified":"2025-02-18T12:48:17","modified_gmt":"2025-02-18T12:48:17","slug":"a-woman-at-the-post-office-handled-mail-with-illegible-addresses-one-day-she-found-a-letter-to-god-with-no-address-and-decided-to-open-it-it-read","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=5049","title":{"rendered":"A woman at the Post Office handled mail with illegible addresses. One day, she found a letter to God with no address and decided to open it. It read:"},"content":{"rendered":"

Eleanor had been working in the Dead Letter Office for five years, but she\u2019d never seen anything quite like this \u2014 an envelope addressed simply to \u201cGod\u201d in shaky handwriting that looked like it had been written during an earthquake.<\/strong><\/h2>\n

Inside was a letter that made her heart squeeze:<\/p>\n

\u201cDear God, I\u2019m Martha, 85 years young and running low on miracles. Some sneaky youngster with unusually fast hands swiped my purse yesterday with my entire month\u2019s pension. $120. I\u2019ve got five dear friends coming for Christmas dinner, and now I can\u2019t even afford a can of cranberry sauce. I know you\u2019re busy with world peace and all, but could you spare a miracle for an old lady with a sweet tooth and empty cupboards? Love, Martha (the one with the crooked garden gnome collection at the end of Maple Street).\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Eleanor shared the letter with her coworkers. By lunch, they\u2019d collected $116, raiding coffee funds, lunch money, and that secret candy bar stash everyone pretended not to know about.<\/p>\n

A week after Christmas, another letter arrived:<\/p>\n

\u201cDear God, You\u2019re a real peach! That $116 you\u2019d left in my mailbox made for the best Christmas dinner ever! My friends said it was divine intervention. I\u2019d say they\u2019re right! Even my arthritis felt better!<\/em><\/p>\n

P.S. Some sticky-fingered postal worker must\u2019ve skimmed $4 off the top. Might want to look into that. I hear you\u2019ve got connections with Santa\u2019s naughty list! Love, Martha.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

\n

An Old Woman Walked Into A Supermarket.<\/strong><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

The old lady is in the supermarket and starts throwing the frozen veggies on the floor, so the manager asks if he can help.<\/strong><\/h2>\n

\u201cI\u2019m looking for Broccoli.\u201d<\/p>\n

He informs her that they are out of stock, and she leaves.<\/p>\n

An hour later she is back throwing the frozen veggies onto the floor, the irate manager asks again if he can help.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m looking for Broccoli.\u201d<\/p>\n

Once again he informs her that they are out of stock.<\/p>\n

15 mins before closing, she comes stalking straight to the frozen veggies, as she is about to start throwing them out, the very irritated manager asks can I help.<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m looking for Broccoli.\u201d<\/p>\n

The Manager asks Madam can you spell Dog in Dogmore.<\/p>\n

She says yes \u201dDOG.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cVery good, can you spell Cat in Catsdelight.\u201d<\/p>\n

She says \u201cCAT.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cVery good, now can you spell F in Broccoli.\u201d<\/p>\n

She says, \u201dthere\u2019s no F in Broccoli.\u201c<\/p>\n

\u201cMadam, I\u2019ve been trying to tell you that all day!!!\u201d<\/p>\n

LOL!!<\/strong><\/p>\n

Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Eleanor had been working in the Dead Letter Office for five years, but she\u2019d never seen anything quite like this \u2014 an envelope addressed simply to \u201cGod\u201d in shaky handwriting that looked like it had been written during an earthquake. Inside was a letter that made her heart squeeze: \u201cDear God, I\u2019m Martha, 85 years […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5049","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5049","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=5049"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5049\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5050,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5049\/revisions\/5050"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=5049"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=5049"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=5049"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}