Ma and Pa were two old hillbillies living out on a farm up in the hills.<\/p>\n
Pa has found out that the hole under the outhouse is full.<\/p>\n
He goes into the house and tells Ma that he doesn\u2019t know what to do to empty the hole.<\/p>\n
Ma says,<\/p>\n
\u201cWhy don\u2019t you go ask the young\u2019n down the road? He must be smart \u2019cause he\u2019s a college gradjyate.\u201d<\/p>\n
So Pa drives down to the neighbour\u2019s house and asks him,<\/p>\n
\u201cMr College gradjyate, my outhouse hole is full, and I don\u2019t know what to do to empty it.\u201d<\/p>\n
The young\u2019n tells him,<\/p>\n
\u201cGet yourself two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse. Put them both under the outhouse and light them both at the same time.<\/p>\n
The first one will go off and shoot the outhouse in the air. While it\u2019s in the air the second one will then go off and spread the poop all across your farm, fertilizing your ground.<\/p>\n
The outhouse should then come back down to the same spot atop the now-empty hole.\u201d<\/p>\n
Pa thanks the neighbour, then drives to the hardware store and picks up two sticks of dynamite, one with a short fuse and one with a long fuse.<\/p>\n
He goes home and puts them under the outhouse.<\/p>\n
He then lights them and runs behind a tree.<\/p>\n
All of a sudden, Ma comes running out of the house and into the outhouse! Off goes the first stick of dynamite, shooting the outhouse into the air.<\/p>\n
BOOM! Off goes the second stick of dynamite, spreading poop all over the farm.<\/p>\n
Then, WHAM! The outhouse comes crashing back down atop the hole.<\/p>\n
Pa races to the outhouse throw open the door and asks,<\/p>\n
\u201cMa, are you all right?\u201d<\/p>\n
As she pulls up her panties she says,<\/p>\n
\u201cYeah, but I\u2019m sure glad I didn\u2019t fart in the kitchen!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Ma and Pa were two old hillbillies living out on a farm up in the hills. Pa has found out that the hole under the outhouse is full. He goes into the house and tells Ma that he doesn\u2019t know what to do to empty the hole. Ma says, \u201cWhy don\u2019t you go ask the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4840","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4840","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4840"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4840\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4841,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4840\/revisions\/4841"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4840"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4840"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4840"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}