{"id":4469,"date":"2025-01-20T10:32:26","date_gmt":"2025-01-20T10:32:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=4469"},"modified":"2025-01-20T10:32:26","modified_gmt":"2025-01-20T10:32:26","slug":"little-johnny-gets-an-f-in-math","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=4469","title":{"rendered":"Little Johnny gets an F in math"},"content":{"rendered":"

I am sure that there are not many people who favored mathematics at school. Well, dealing with numbers, fractions, percentages, and the rest of the math operations, isn\u2019t quite easy.<\/p>\n

Little Johnny seems not to be an exception. His multiplication skills, or lack of them, brought him in trouble.<\/p>\n

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Pexels<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

Little Johnny comes home from school and tells his father,<\/em>\u00a0\u201dI got an F in math today.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

His father replies, \u201dWhat happened?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Little Johnny says, \u201dWell, my teacher asked me, \u2018What\u2019s 3 times 2\u2019, and I said 6.\u2019\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

The father replies, \u201dWell, that\u2019s correct.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Little Johnny says, \u201dI know. Then she asked me, \u2018What\u2019s 2 times 3.\u2019\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

The father shouts, \u201dWhat the fuck is the difference?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Little Johnny says, \u201dThat\u2019s what I said!\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

If this made you laugh,\u00a0below is another joke<\/a>\u00a0that will make your day.<\/p>\n

A couple had been married for years, and the only friction in their marriage was the husband\u2019s habit of farting loudly every morning when he awoke.<\/em><\/p>\n

The noise would wake his wife and the smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.<\/em><\/p>\n

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Pexels<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping them off because it was making her sick. He told her he couldn\u2019t stop and that it was perfectly natural. She told him to see a doctor. She was concerned that one day he would blow his guts out.<\/em><\/p>\n

The years went by and he continued to rip them out! Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner and he was upstairs sound asleep, she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck, gizzard, liver and all the spare parts and a malicious thought came to her.<\/em><\/p>\n

She took the bowl and went upstairs where her husband was sound asleep and, gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waistband of his underpants and emptied the bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.<\/em><\/p>\n

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Pexels<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

Some time later she heard her husband waken with his usual trumpeting which was followed by a blood curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran into the bathroom.<\/em><\/p>\n

The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing, tears in her eyes! After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back pretty good.<\/em><\/p>\n

About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his bloodstained underpants with a look of horror on his face.<\/em><\/p>\n

She bit her lip as she asked him what was the matter. He said, \u201cHoney, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I didn\u2019t listen to you.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWhat do you mean?\u201d asked his wife.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cWell, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out, and today it finally happened. But by the grace of God, some Vaseline, and these two fingers, I think I got them all back in.<\/em><\/p>\n

Please SHARE these\u00a0jokes<\/a>\u00a0with your family and friends on Facebook.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I am sure that there are not many people who favored mathematics at school. Well, dealing with numbers, fractions, percentages, and the rest of the math operations, isn\u2019t quite easy. Little Johnny seems not to be an exception. His multiplication skills, or lack of them, brought him in trouble. Pexels Little Johnny comes home from […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2719,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-4469","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4469","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=4469"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4469\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4470,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/4469\/revisions\/4470"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2719"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=4469"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=4469"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=4469"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}