A nun was sitting at the airport, waiting for her flight to Chicago.<\/p>\n
She looked over in the corner and saw one of those weight machines that tells your fortune and thought to herself, \u201cI\u2019ll give it a try and see what it tells me.\u201d<\/p>\n
She went over to the machine, stepped up on the scale and put her nickel in.<\/p>\n
Out came a card that read, \u201cYou are a nun. You weigh 128 lbs, and you are going to Chicago.\u201d<\/p>\n
The Nun sat back down and told herself that the machine probably gives the same card to everyone. The more she thught about it, the more curious she got so she decided to try it again.<\/p>\n
She went back to the machine and again put her nickel in. Out came a card that read: \u201cYou are a Nun. You weigh 128 lbs. You are going to Chicago and you are going to play a fiddle.\u201d<\/p>\n
The Nun says to herself, \u201cI know that is wrong. I have never played a musical instrument even once in my life.\u201d She sat back down.<\/p>\n
From out of nowhere a cowboy came over and sat down, putting his fiddle case on the seat between them. Without thinking, she opened the cowboy\u2019s case, took out the fiddle, and started playing beautiful music.<\/p>\n
Surprised at what she had done, she looked over at the machine, thinking \u201cthis is incredible. I\u2019ve got to try this again.\u201d<\/p>\n
Back to the machine she went, put in another nickel, and another card came out. It read, \u201cYou are a Nun. You weigh 128 lbs. You are going to Chicago and you are going to break wind.\u201d<\/p>\n
Now she knows the machine is wrong as she thought to herself \u201cI\u2019ve never broken wind in public a single time in my life.\u201d But getting down off the machine she slipped, and as she was straining to keep herself from falling to the floor, she broke wind.<\/p>\n
Absolutely stunned, she sat back down and looked at the machine. She said to herself, \u201cThis is truly remarkable. I\u2019ve got to try this again.\u201d<\/p>\n
She went back to the machine, put in another nickel, and another card came out. It read, \u201cYou are a Nun. You weigh 128 lbs. You have fiddled and farted around and missed your flight to Chicago.\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A nun was sitting at the airport, waiting for her flight to Chicago. She looked over in the corner and saw one of those weight machines that tells your fortune and thought to herself, \u201cI\u2019ll give it a try and see what it tells me.\u201d She went over to the machine, stepped up on the […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2724,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3567","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3567","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3567"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3567\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3568,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3567\/revisions\/3568"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2724"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3567"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3567"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3567"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}