{"id":3080,"date":"2024-10-11T12:08:18","date_gmt":"2024-10-11T11:08:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=3080"},"modified":"2024-10-11T12:08:18","modified_gmt":"2024-10-11T11:08:18","slug":"three-old-ladies-were-sitting-at-the-dinner-table","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/?p=3080","title":{"rendered":"Three Old Ladies Were Sitting At The Dinner Table"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Three old ladies were sitting at the dinner table discussing their problems with getting old.<\/p>\n<p>The first one said,<\/p>\n<p>\u201cSometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand while standing in front of the refrigerator, and I can\u2019t remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich\u201d.<\/p>\n<p>The second lady says,<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYes, sometimes I find myself on the landing of the stairs and can\u2019t remember whether I was on my way up or on my way down\u201d.<\/p>\n<p>The third one says,<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWell, ladies, I\u2019m glad I don\u2019t have any of those problems, knock on wood\u201d.<\/p>\n<p>As she hit her knuckles on the table she looked up and said,<\/p>\n<p>\u201cThat must be the door\u2026 I\u2019ll get it!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Three old ladies were sitting at the dinner table discussing their problems with getting old. The first one said, \u201cSometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my hand while standing in front of the refrigerator, and I can\u2019t remember whether I need to put it away, or start making a sandwich\u201d. The [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2718,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3080","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-random-stuff"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3080","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3080"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3080\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3081,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3080\/revisions\/3081"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/2718"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3080"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3080"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/buzzfeednews.uk\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3080"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}